It is said that one of the most beautiful things in life is to experience loving someone and being loved in return. For those of us who have been there, it is truly bliss, but what happens when the relationship hits the rock? Is it right to cut all ties with your ex? Let us look into it together.
Staying away from your ex, who has clearly shown interest in ending the relationship with you, is very helpful during a breakup, as you will have less attachment to him and whatever kept you attracted to him throughout the relationship. This is where social media and the confusion about blocking come in.
Breakups have always been painful, the entire process of accepting the breakup to the stage of moving on and finally finding love again is difficult, you will need all the support you can possibly get. What you don’t need is stalking your ex on social media platforms to see if he has moved on or not, whatever you see will only hurt you and stab your ego. If you find yourself stalking, you should block your ex to curb that temptation of checking him out, especially if he is an active social media user.
As if breakups aren’t painful enough, social media and the entire internet just make it harder to let go, why? Maybe because, in a weird way, social media was the third person in the relationship, it made love and communication easier, it also made the relationship more public, since you post loved-up photos that everyone admires. Even long-distance relationships, that used to be so hard, are now easier to do because of facetime, WhatsApp video calls, etc.
Since social media became a crucial part of our lives, different relationships have circled around it, including romantic relationships, like the one you had with your ex. This simply means that actively using social media after a breakup will remind you of your ex and slow down the healing process. If your breakup was messy, I know what you’re thinking. You’re wondering if you need to quit social media to get over your broken heart. The truth is that you don’t, if anyone should leave social media, it’s your ex, and you can make that possible in your own small world by blocking him on all platforms.
If the breakup was cool, and you happen to be one of those who don’t want to move on, you still need to block your ex, at least at the initial stages of the breakup, this is to make him miss you enough to reach out and ask to see you again.
Still confused about blocking your ex? Here are answers to the common questions people ask after a breakup.
Should I block my ex to get over him?
Look at it this way; what happened in your friend’s relationship is not what happened in yours, your friend’s ex does not behave like yours, what led to your friend’s breakup may not be what led to yours. Because of these differences in circumstances, people have different opinions when asked about blocking an ex, and these different opinions are not wrong, they are all valid with respect to the situation.
What is constant is your happiness and peace of mind, and you should do whatever it takes to have peace. Some people don’t want their ex to think they are bitter about the breakup, so they don’t use the block option, even if it will help them get over the relationship. You shouldn’t really get bothered by what your ex may think of you after blocking him. If he is the type that will call you up and say mean things, you have the option of not picking that call or simply blocking his line from calling yours. Whatever gives you peace of mind is what you should do.
Whether the breakup was messy or not, blocking your ex will help you get over him. However, you have to be sure that you really want to get over him and rule out all chances of getting back together. Think of it as burning the bridge, even if he asks you to remain friends with him, that should be your decision, not his, and you really don’t want to be besties with someone who just broke your heart, it will mess you up mentally. So, block him, then maybe later, if and when you decide to be friends, you can reconnect as mere acquaintances.
If you are still in love with your ex, it will hurt you to see him with someone else. If it was a long-distance relationship, you should be happy, because the chances of you running into your ex and his new hot girl are very slim. All you have to do is block him. Blocking him will save you the pain of seeing his loved-up photos and details of his new relationship. You will definitely get jealous and even start comparing yourself with his new girlfriend, which is going to make it hard for you to get over him. If it is not a long-distance relationship, you will have to block him and avoid places where he hangs out, find other fun spots to chill with your friends. He could take his new girl to the places he likes, and you could meet them there, so it’s best to avoid that spot, for your own mental health.
If your relationship was abusive, blocking your ex is a lot more than something you should just do to get over him, it is medically advisable to cut all ties with your ex because of your mental and physical wellbeing. There are people who even take vacations or move out of their city just to get over the whole mess they went through. If you can, it is good to seek medical help after blocking your ex from having any access to you.
Should I block my ex on social media?
As previously stated, your peace is the most important thing, so if you want to leave your phone number accessible to him, that’s fine, since you will only hear from him when he calls you. As healthy as it is to block your ex on social media, some people might tell you it is not a cool move, which could affect your decision, but you should do whatever makes you happy.
Blocking your former lover on social media means that you will no longer see his activities, and that will give you a liberating feeling, which is exactly what you need, even if the breakup was not messy. In that relationship, you held on for a while, and some reasons made you do that. It will be hard to just forget everything immediately, so start the process of liberating yourself by blocking him on Facebook, WhatsApp, Twitter, Instagram, etc.
All the focus on blocking your partner so you don’t see his activities are just half of the reasons why it will help you get over the pain. You see, when you block your ex on social media, he also doesn’t get to see your activities, which is very good for you, especially if the relationship ended because he cheated.
There were two people in that relationship; you and your ex, and while you may think he easily got over you, it is not always the case, even if he seems happy. If you cried and begged him not to leave you, he will want to check you out on social media to know how you are doing. Don’t give him the satisfaction of seeing you hurt, block him, and start with the platform you are most active on. I know you may want to let him see your activities, you want to show him just how well you are doing without him, but trust me you won’t get much satisfaction from that. What will give you long term satisfaction is the fact that he doesn’t know how you are doing without him. That confusion and mystery will haunt him, let this satisfy you. It is better than allowing him to see everything about your healing process, leaving you open to any comment he might have, which could hurt you as you try to heal.
One of the most beneficial reasons to block your ex on social media is closure. Even if you know what led to the end of your relationship, you will still ask yourself why it happened and what you could have done better. You might even blame yourself and start wondering if you will ever find love again. These thoughts are harmful to your mind and will keep growing as long as your ex still shows up on your news feed. The sooner you get closure, the sooner you get over the relationship and all the what ifs that disturb your mind. So, go ahead, make the bold move and block your ex on social media!
Should I block my ex during no contact?
Of course, the term “no contact” already tells you that there should be no form of communication between you and your ex. A lot of people misunderstand this rule, so I will give you more details.
The term “no contact” refers to the popular rule that says you should not text, call, visit, greet, or connect with your ex in any way after the breakup. In case you didn’t know, this also means you should not talk about the breakup with mutual friends you made with your ex. If you were in the relationship for a long time, chances are you have a lot of mutual friends who may want to ask you about the breakup and know how you feel about your ex, to truly practice no contact, you may need to temporarily cut ties with them if they insist on talking about your ex anytime they see you. His family members are not exempt, if you were visiting his home often, his family members would miss you and want to reach out to see how well you’re doing. If you must answer their calls, be polite and make sure you avoid talking about the breakup and your feelings.
No contact is usually 30 to 90 days. That’s 30 to 90 days of acting like your ex just vanished from the surface of the earth. You are only human, and love is a powerful feeling, so if you check on your ex anywhere between your chosen no contact period, don’t beat yourself up. Just start afresh the next day with more determination and discipline. If you need help, be sure to ask your family and friends to assist you. Another powerful assistant during this period is the block button on every social media handle, if he has business pages, unfollow them, if you are in the same WhatsApp groups, exit them, this is a battle for your peace of mind and you need to do all it takes to get it.
Now that we have clarified the no contact rule, do you see why it is necessary to block your ex during that period? You need no connections with him at all. You will feel empty and hurt at first, especially if he did not even notice your absence, but you will get over it as time goes on.
Should I block my ex on Instagram?
Of all the special media platforms, Instagram is by far the most visual. If you want to get your ex out of your mind, blocking him on Instagram will do you a lot of good. No matter how strong you think you are, seeing him every time you use Instagram will stir up memories, both good and bad ones, and you will break down again. Is that how you want to drag on and on without really getting closure? If your answer is no, then you should not hesitate to block your ex, unless you want to stop using the app altogether.
If you are the one who ended the relationship, your ex probably begged you to stay, but you have your reasons, so you did the right thing by leaving. In such cases, your ex will be the one feeling more pain, since they have to adjust to immediately living without you. They may also be trying to get you back via different means. If you know there is no way you are getting back with him, help him out of the illusion of a reconciliation by blocking on Instagram.
If blocking your ex makes you feel guilty, imagine how bad you will feel if they keep commenting on your photos and reminding you of good times. Just imagine how much guilt you’ll have to endure when your ex calls you to talk about something you wore in your recent Instagram picture, reminding you how he used to like taking pictures of you wearing such clothes. That’s how the trip down memory lane will begin, and you will hear them break down as your ex talks about how much he misses you. If he cheated or did something similar, he will promise to change and ask you for one last chance.
At this point, even if your feelings for him are gone, you will feel so much guilt and rethink your actions, but this is unhealthy for you because it will all be out of pity. So, you are stuck in between being seen as a hard-hearted monster who would not give love a second chance, and being the unhappy person who went back to her ex out of pity. Such confusion! Most of which could have been avoided if you had blocked your ex on Instagram, and he wouldn’t have seen the photo or video that triggered all those memories.
You really need time away, on your own, without your ex, so that you can think straight about your next line of action. Some hard decisions need to be taken in life, and after those decisions, the actions that follow show just how serious you are about the decision. A breakup is one of those decisions that you need to follow up with intentional actions, one that is devoid of any distractions. You need your peace of mind, and seeing your sexy ex boyfriend’s pictures whenever you open Instagram will rob you of that peace of mind, the emotional roller-coaster is not worth it. If you were brave enough to leave a relationship, you should have the guts necessary to do whatever it takes to move on. Block your ex on Instagram.
Should I block my ex on WhatsApp?
In any relationship, communication is vital. Without proper communication, a relationship is doomed to fail. In fact, the first signs of a breaking relationship are weakening lines of communication; you no longer want to reach out like you used to, and you don’t really miss it either.
In this day and age, WhatsApp is arguably the biggest instant messaging platform, so it is safe to say that WhatsApp is so powerful, it is the main channel of communication in most relationships, which means I am not exaggerating when I say that WhatsApp is what is holding your relationship together, especially if it is a long-distance relationship.
So, if your relationship has ended, why exactly are you still seeing your ex’s status update on WhatsApp? Blocking your ex on WhatsApp will send a stronger message than blocking on other social media. Most people even break up via WhatsApp, especially those in long distance relationships. Immediately after the breakup, a goodwill message and an immediate use of the block option should be your next move.
Remember, for you to get over your ex, you need to start cutting off those things that kept you attached to him, starting with the most effective. For most people in long distance relationships, WhatsApp is the most important app on their phone. So, if we are to go by the rule of eliminating the most effective means of communication, WhatsApp should actually be the first place you block your ex, before moving on to Instagram and the others.
When most people break up, they usually show it on their WhatsApp status updates. From the sad messages they post, you can tell that they just got dumped and will do anything to feel whole again, their posts will make you pity them. Perhaps that’s why they are posting it, to get pity from friends or their ex, who might see how miserable they are and take them back…which is a very bad idea! If you know you will act this way and go crazy on WhatsApp over the breakup, that is even one more reason why you should block your ex. Also, you are free to block any mutual friend who might tell him about what you are posting.
While some heartbroken lovers use WhatsApp as a place to wallow in pain, others use it as a place to pretend they are okay and doing just fine without their ex. If you fall into this category, the temptation to leave your ex online will be strong, but you can overcome it, you have to, because if you don’t, you will feel a lot more pain than you did before.
Getting dumped can seriously affect your ego, and if you already have complex issues, you will feel more need to prove to your ex that you are okay without him, this need to show you are not affected by the breakup may even surpass your need to truly get over him. At this point, you may not realize it, but not blocking your ex just to allow him see your supposedly happy and IDGAF WhatsApp status, shows you are not putting your happiness first.
The whole thing might even work against you because if you start posting your hottest photos and videos, as well as your “strong independent women” status updates, you will be able to see if he has viewed them or not and imagine how embarrassed you will feel when he doesn’t react to those things you are doing specifically to get his attention. Even if he does, he may not react the way you want, and that will hurt your ego even more. The best thing to do is block him and prove to yourself that you can actually get through this and come out a better person.
Many people have tried to use WhatsApp status updates to play mind games on their exes who dumped them, but these tricks don’t work. If you think wearing the same dress you wore on your first date and using it as your WhatsApp display picture will trigger memories and make your ex come back to you, it means you are still living in denial, you have not accepted the breakup yet, and this is usually the first stage of grief. Your ex and your mutual friends will see through the fake joy you are showing on WhatsApp, and it is really embarrassing, since people may not tell you they know why you are uploading such things, just so they don’t hurt your feelings. Since you are clouded by emotions, you will be the only one who is not seeing the way others see your updates. By others, I mean those who were close to you and your ex. You really don’t want to be viewed as a weak heartbroken person, desperate to look happy after being dumped, so don’t even try playing mind games on WhatsApp for any reason. Block him.
If you have just come out of an abusive relationship, it is almost certain that your ex will be all over WhatsApp, posting things specifically targeted at hurting your feelings. No matter how strong you are, you don’t need that energy, even if you think you can withstand it. Your mental health should be prioritized. So, you of all people should block your ex and his closest friends from WhatsApp. This is because he might be asking them to talk to you and get feedback or spy on your activities, it is common with abusers. An abusive ex is even capable of using a friend’s phone to chat with you, so take your freedom one step further, and seal it by blocking your abusive ex on all platforms, starting with WhatsApp.
Should I block my ex on Facebook?
Of all the social media applications and websites, Facebook seems to be the most down-to-earth. It is the place where family members from far and wide come together to connect. On Facebook, you can tell the world about your relationship with people. You can show who your family members are, who your colleagues are, who your closest friends are, and of course, you can show who you have a romantic relationship with.
When you start dating someone, you are excited and feel the need to tell the world about it. If you are an active Facebook user, I am sure you have seen many notifications like “Sally is in a relationship with Bob”. Whenever I see such notifications, I can easily tell that it’s either those two people just started dating, or they just joined Facebook. Either way, they have made it public, and if you did that with your partner, people could see as you and your partner display love on the internet. You basically integrated your Facebook account with your partner’s.
Now that you have broken up in reality, it is only fair that the relationship should also end on Facebook. You don’t want potential suitors refusing to send you a message because your profile says you are in a relationship with someone whose name and Facebook account is linked to yours. So, go ahead and update your Facebook profile, your Facebook community should know you are no longer in a relationship with your ex. Unlink him from your profile, so your friends will get a notification that you are single. After doing this, you should go ahead and block your ex, since that will just seal the separation, even if he doesn’t update his relationship status on Facebook, you will automatically be unlinked from him when you use the block button, so go ahead and do it.
If you have uploaded photos of him all over Facebook, deleting them is a matter of choice. It all depends on the way you guys broke up, as well as what you can handle. If leaving pictures and videos of the good times you had together makes you miss him so much, you are free to delete them, since that will help you get closure and peace of mind. If people keep asking you questions after you update your profile and delete your ex’s photos, you can simply say you broke up and end it there, you have no obligation to explain why you broke up to your Facebook friends. But if you do not block your ex, don’t blame them for tagging you both in photos, as far as they are concerned, you are still together.
So, you see, blocking your ex on Facebook will not only help you get closure, it will also show those who were actively involved in the “Facebook part” of your relationship, that things are over between you two, and this will benefit you because no one will ask you about him anymore, when they see you have blocked your ex and updated your profile, they will respect you by not mentioning him or tagging you in issues that concern him.
You never really know who has a crush on you if you are in a relationship. So, when you update your profile and block your ex, you have indirectly given confidence to whoever has romantic interests in you. Now that you are single and free, they can send you a private message to express their feelings for you, something that would never happen if you don’t block your ex. In summary, blocking your ex on Facebook will open doors to new love interests, and while it is not advisable to jump into a new relationship immediately after a breakup, it is good to start getting familiar with whoever looks genuine.
In summary, it’s advisable to block your ex on social media and other channels if you can. That will give you peace of mind and let you focus on your life and new relationship.